Helical

Need haunts me on my breath and knees
As I break my every heart, bone and vow
My skin deflates like a purpose yet unknown
The end is not my own and it leaves no clue
And everything else burns white in my view

And so I spin
And I swing
In the truth I'm residing
I'm not surviving and I'm not free
Outside this helical, I'm not me

I linger in the havoc and the profit I create
'Til I know how safe I'll be while I'm here
And it starves me of any kind of love or pain
The loss includes a gain and it's all I can see
I linger in my passion as if it's my last belief 

I count my wishes and days
And I know they don't fit anywhere
They go back and forth endlessly
As every word here gasps for air
I almost can't feel it still